It is often said that Japanese people can’t say YES or NO. Probably yes but not completely. But even people can’t say YES or NO, we aren’t involved in so many troubles in Japan. This is one of typical culture in Japan. Our culture is reading people’s mind is very important without asking. Maybe sounds strange for other nationalities. But not so difficult just we try to be companion’s situation and look at the eyes, the behavior, the tone of voice, the atmosphere throughly. Then easily you will know his/her answer. This is one of Japanese virtue. But it’s not working except Japan. So kindly everybody says to me “You have to say yes or no clearly when you don’t want to” I’ve really tried hard to say “NO” when I don’t want since I’ve started to live in Europe. But I haven’t got used to it completly I think still need time.
Today in the class we talked about a plan for next Thursday. And everybody said “Let’s go to Zurich lake and have a party” this day is actually for normal lesson and we paid for lesson. In addition we had a party during lesson without learning. I thought: “Why? On Thursday normally we have lesson like other classes do, we can do it weekend and also we just had a party last week. Other classes have lessons and our class have a party. It’s strange! Here is school not for having party”. Then teacher asked all students: “If you think this is good idea please raise your hand”. Everybody raised their hand except me. Of course everybody are completely opposed to my opinion. And started to make my mind change even I said “No” many times. Then some students said “Who paid your fee? Your husband? If so you can come…” I can’t understand this thinking. Doesn’t matter who paid the lesson fees. The fees are for learning not having a party. I like parties but I don’t like doing something too far. During break the teacher also tried to persuade me and again I tried hard to explain my mind with my poor German. I was really irritated with my poor german. Even though the plan is still on the air. It’s difficult to express my feeling but I was really shoked and sad and went to the toilet and cried. So I think saying “YES” or “NO” is important but not enough to survive in foreign countries. We need to stick to our true feeling and continue insisting on it because some people stick to you to change your mind until you give up.
I thought I was strong enough to live in overseas. But it’s seems to be not strong enough to survive. I’m ashamed myself and miss Japanese people’s way of thinking.
I want to be strong, no I have to be strong to survive in overseas.
And always thank for Stefan’s family they always protect me. I’m happy they are here.